Painful Distinctions
by felicityetern0
Summary: After an incident where Roxas's parents die and he's left with only his brother Sora,a broken heart,and a new high school to go to,what will he think when he meets the most popular guy in school with a punk attitude and the total hots for him? BoyxBoy!
1. Damn My Inner Monologue!

**~~~Painful Distinctions~~~**

BoyxBoy no like, no read! Possible smut later, muahaha! Touch of angst, a lot of humor, and A BUNCH of romance R&R

**Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts nor any of the songs that I may use in this or later chapters. Yes I do wish I did own KH. The next game would be called "Rainbow Luv" and I think you could guess what would be in it *über nosebleed* **

I had waited so long for this moment, the one moment I could finally start over with my life…the one time I could change my destiny as I knew it, for it had changed so many times for me…I can't even keep track anymore. The only memories I had of that last place were my brother beside me and the clothes on my back. Scratch that, they were all burned too. Good riddance.

But I'll explain about that later, now it's time to go to the present. Damn I always have this inner monologue running through my head. Anyways…

Sora was like my brother. *sweat drop* Well...that's because he is but you know what I mean! Some brothers I know completely hate each other, great example, Riku and Ansem. I can't believe that no one's figured out yet that they're bros; I mean seriously, they fight all the time. That can't just be because Riku's always trying to be as good as Ansem is at everything. Even if he is a total douche. You tell him that and I'll kick your ass.

_Because then he'll kick yours, hehe, scratch that he'll probably molest it._

Damn it! Ugh but you're probably right…he has been acting like a total weirdo since the Organization broke up a few years ago when Riku, Sora and Ansem got into a huge fight. And this wasn't the usual gay-ass hissy fits that they usually throw…it was much more. Ansem had been getting into steroids, and trying to get Riku into it too. Sora completely and utterly freaked out and demanded that Ansem stop it all. That didn't go down well. I don't know all the details but Riku ended up living with Sora in his house.

_You know what that means, hump city! LOL! _

O-O Ew.

Oh god I hope I never think that again…DAMN YOU MONOLOGUE!

_Just doin my job ^^ _

Well…anyway…yes Sora and I do live in "separate" houses but they are connected in the middle. There's a living room, dining room, guest room, and master bedroom. We have one kitchen that's totally huge but Sora seems to be able to get every inch of dirty each time he attempts to make a bowl of cornflakes. Guess who shares the bed with Sora? Riku. Every night. You would think that this mansion thing would have thicker walls. F### you all.

Guess who shares the bed with me?

No one. Nothing. Except for my bunny, Mr. Foo Foo Cuddly Pants.

…_Niceeee…_

Tell anyone I said that and I will kill you. *death glare*

_Not like I can, I'm you, remember?_

Going on, again.

And yes, my family is totally loaded. But that's probably because of all the insurance money we got from…the incident…

But I haven't talked to anyone about that since it happened. And it's gonna stay that way. No questions asked, because now everyone pities me about what happened so much so that they'll do whatever I want.

Of course our uncle, Marluxia, does send a few grand our way. With his money that he gets in...rather suspicious ways...Sora and I have exchanged many thoughts on how he gets the dough to send us. Our ideas have been everything from porn movies to the assasination of aliens.

The alien bit was Sora's idea, but most of mine were drifting towards porn and strip clubs.

_Ah yes, Uncle Diddles!_

Pffttt...yeah that was a nickname that Sora and I gave him while walking in on...something...*puke* Believe me, the guy(s) *shudder* was/were of age...but it was still wierd!

But oddly enough that's how we BOTH found out something about ourselves.

We were both gay.

And I mean flamin gay.

It was more...obvious with Sora because well, he's all bubbly and rather "fruity" as Riku and I put it to annoy him.

But for me it was more of a wake-up call. Ugh, I can't put it that way...it sounds like I'm some closet case with a rainbow knocking at my door saying," Hey flamer it's time to come out of your emo corner."

Why thank you magical gay-ass rainbow. That is so helpful.

The truth is I was in an emo corner for awhile, who wouldn't be? After the Marluxia thing happened I was more open about it but before that had seen so many homosexuals at my school get beat up because of...you know, just being who they were! After what happened to Hayner...I dunno if I should even be coming out now at this school...like I said before...this is a new start..even though I have no idea at all where this road would lead to. I never said anything at my old school, even though all my friends knew. And they would never tell anyone on their life. Heh. I got homies!

That's why Sora is the person in the world that I'm closest to right now, we've always been connected, but now we're experiencing the same thing, and went through the "incident" from before, together. Even though he's got Riku to protect him if anyone does find out about them being gay. It's not obvious if he's your friend, but when it comes to protecting friends and ESPECIALLY Sora, well, he'll rip your extremities off before you can say "fagnugget." (AN: that word belongs to AxelKanjoVIII, mah bestie!) Heheh...fagnugget. Uhmm..*cough* ahem.

Sora was my closest person. But now I have a strange feeling that's about to change…

A screeching wail interrupted me and sent me flying onto the floor.

(To be continued…)

Rate and review please! Seriously don't be lazy like I am haha. This may turn angsty but I'm not one to leave a fanfic on a sad note…or AM I? Muahahaaa you'll find out so keep reading! Possible smuttyness like all the good ones have! Lol. Please no extreme flames, just some criticism is toootally awesome! I luves it all! BoyxBoy, no like, no read beotchz!


	2. Who dat?

Unfortunately this annoying screech was my alarm clock that first screeched to wake me up and then played my theme song that is apparently supposed to make me feel SO MUCH better.

Sora's an idiot. Damn his newfound obsession with Zexion's friggin intelligence for re-programming things. Yeah, Zexy was one of our closest friends, albeit his way of not talking much. But why, oh why choose my theme song? I hear that enough while playing myself in Zexion's game he made for us. We keep begging him to tell us the ending, but he nearly never responds and when he does it's always about "finding out who we really are." God he's so cryptic.

I was thrown out of bed in complete startled surprise of being woken up from my dream. Ugh I've been having so many strange ones lately…mostly about what happened only a few months ago...falling…falling…

But here I am dreaming about my inner monologue and my first day of high school that I've been dreading yet have been so excited about ever since the news came around that I was ready for school again.

Damn, that's today.

Aw crap…

My theme song was coming to an end, thank god, but that means I really have to get moving. Otherwise Sora'll come and glomp me soon.

Too late.

Before I can think again Sora soars through my door, jumping on my bed trying to surprise me. After not finding me amongst my bedcovers covered in chibi's, he looks around ion confusion, hair bobbing around everywhere.

"Down here," I grumble, it wasn't that hard to miss me, I'm so short and tiny that it's hard not to.

"Aha! GLOMP TIME!" he grinned as I looked at him in panic. He was going to use my springy bed to propel himself onto me.

Sora flew through the air and what I thought was going to be my death was interrupted by a voice.

" Sora what are you doing now?" Riku the almighty savior held a disgruntled yet blushing Sora by his waist and legs in midair. He looked a tiny bit triumphant about the blushing, but only I could see it in his smirk. Haha, Riku: 1 Sora: 0.

"Just trying to have some fun, fun killer…" Sora mumbled the last part but Riku could still hear it.

"What did you call me?"

"Fun killer! I mean really, I'm just tryin to wake up my little brother properly. And…"

Sora was cut off abruptly when Riku's mouth crashed against his in a quieting and passionate kiss. Blegh, but now I was kinda pissed because I hated being called the little brother, it was only by 4 minutes dammit!

I gagged dramatically as Sora pushed back into the kiss, effectively shutting him up.

Thank you Riku, yet again.

"AHEM! Hey guys we kinda have to start getting read you know!"

They pulled apart and Riku set Sora down, Riku being a good head taller than Sora. You could totally guess who was uke and seme. Lol.

Sora looked rather put out by not being able to finish what usually is about a good 20 minute make out session usually done by the kitchen table whilst I am eating my Lucky Charms.

"Ugh fine, we'll meet you at the car in half an hour." Sora said. Riku was a sophomore and drove a super nice and rather pimpin car. Sora and I were just entering high school as freshmen, yay us. I still feared getting beat up because of what gender I liked. Riku would try and protect me, but he's more focused on Sora, and couldn't be with both of us all the time.

I get up off the floor, grumbling loudly about nothing in particular. Now I really have to get moving. I rush to the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror. Damn I'm so scrawny. I've tried to lift weights with Riku but that usually ends up with me getting stuck under a weight and nearly dying before Riku and Sora save me. Sora's the same way but he just usually does palates or some crap. He's tried to get me into that stuff but I feel weird because I can feel all the dudes who are weight lifting drooling over my ass. Not Sora of course, everyone there knows this: hit on Sora, Riku hits you. Many times. With a brick.

I take off my clothes and turn the shower on super hot, until I realize my little…problem that I recently inherited, probably all the thinking about weight lifters *drool*. So I turned it back to cold. Ugh I've always relished in hot showers, but you do what you must.

After washing up I quickly dried off and went to pick out my signature clothes: sorta-tight skinnies, band shirt (anywhere from The White Stripes to Green Day to some pop singers. Never country, sorry to all the people in the south), checkered wrist band, checkered hoodie, and a brand new pair of black Chucks. Awesome. Oh yeah and checkered boxers, can't forget those. Yup you guessed it, I love checkered anything!

By this time my hair was dry and back to its unruly and annoying form of extreme spikiness. I've tried to tame it with every kind of gel out there but by now I've learned just to accentuate it with a little bit a göt2be here and there. Now onto eyeliner, I applied it kind of thick. I'm not TOTALLY emo, at least not anymore, but I still can't go without it. Along with my awesome necklace that my parents gave to me before…

Nevermind.

I looked at myself in the mirror again and was satisfied with everything, but still made a mental note to try and work out again; maybe they'll have a gym I can use at school.

But I would still go with Riku and Sora…there might be some perverted rapists or something *shudder*

I bounded downstairs after grabbing my checkered messenger bag, my Chucks pounded unceremoniously against the hardwood stairs. I grabbed a Pop-Tart after looking longingly at the sea salt ice cream bars in the freezer, knowing that I'll never have time to finish them. I did try to make sea salt Pop-Tarts before…didn't work out too well. Let's just say that our Moogle snowball lost some of its hair that day when he wandered too close to the cooking pot. Poor snowball…

After locking the door and setting the security system that our friend Lexaus helped us install, insisting that we'll need it in this neighborhood, I ran towards the car. Yup he's totally awesome but taken by Zexion, or rather Zexion was taken by him…over and over again…*shudder/nosebleed* yeah we first slept at their house while we were looking for a place. We lived here with our parents when we were really little, but had to move away for their work. Seeing everyone from when we were like 5 will be interesting…really interesting…

Sora and Riku were waiting tapping their feet at me. Well what do they expect? I'm nearly never on time for anything. They slid into the front seats and I laid down in the back, using my messenger back as a pillow.

"Haha well isn't little Roxy lazy today?" Sora laughed and poked me in the forehead.

"Just because you're all bubbly and hyper in the morning doesn't mean we all have to be…" I mumbled trying to imagine myself back in my bed before the dreaded alarm clock woke me up.

"Aw fine. So are you excited about the first day of our new school?" he exclaimed while bouncing in the seat, both Riku and I rolled out eyes.

"No. What if it sucks like the last one?" I said. Yup I'm such an optimist.

"Nah it's okay. Just find a group once you get there, stay away from the preps and jocks, they're not very friendly to the flamers." Riku said smirking at the end. Sora pouted and once again, craving Riku's attention he whispered sexily in his ear.

"But you'll protect me right?" Riku blushed and shuddered while we veered sideways for a second.

"Hey Sora have your fun later! I don't wanna die via car crash!" I said, freaking out. Riku then glared at Sora for getting such a reaction out of him who was smirking triumphantly back on his side of the car.

"Fiinneee…" Sora grumbled, though I could still see his smirk and glance back at Riku.

"We're here," Riku said.

I faced the biggest school I've ever seen overflowing with every type of person you'll ever meet. Preps, emos, jocks, stoners, and then when my eyes glanced over the punk category of the school, my heart beat rapidly and I was momentarily stunned.

Oh.

My.

God.

(_To be continued...)_

Haha! What or who made Roxas go Mr. Heartthrob on us? Find out next chappy! I'll try and get it up soon! And I'm not gonna have any of those long convos that some authors have with themselves and the characters, I don't really like it that much, I'm just stickin to the story peoples! Maybe another time. Hope you liked, just R&R to tell me what you think! please please please! I love it all! :) 333


	3. Love At First Smash

"HOLY MOTHER OF GOD! They have a sea salt ice cream cart HERE!" I screamed this in complete joy with tears even running down my face. I couldn't believe it! Now I could get my favorite kind of ice cream whenever I wanted! Sora and Riku sweat dropped.

"LOL only you would be this excited about that, Roxas!" Sora laughed. I turned to him, annoyed he had ruined my beautiful moment concerning ice cream.

"At least I don't get excited over everything _else_! " I said. Riku snickered and Sora pouted. Hey, it was true, Sora was as we called it: fruity.

"How about you guys head inside now? I'll park the car and meet up with you in the gym," Riku said. It wasn't a question, he usually didn't ask, only told. But hey, works for me.

"Fine…meet you there my fuzzy bunny!" Sora exclaimed with a giggle, and when Riku was about to complain, gave him a quick goodbye kiss.

But I wasn't the only one who saw that kiss.

A few jocks standing outside of the car looked over to us in a glare of total and complete disdain and disgust. One boy had really long white hair, wearing all black and shoulder pads of some sort, must be on the football team, a girl with blonde hair and two antenna looking things sticking out on either side making her look like some sort of ant creature, a boy with kinda long blonde hair and a really bony and creepy face. Scratch that. They all had extremely creepy faces. Oh no. These must be the retards Riku was talking about, the homophobes. No no no! I didn't want to be beat up for just being me here! I'm tired of waiting! But what are these guys capable of…?

Thank god, Riku saw them staring and shot one of his patented death glares of DOOM right at them, ha take that!

Yes, they walked away, probably to go back inside. But I know that they'll be around, they don't seem like the kind just to watch. They do stuff too, but I'll be watching them.

Sora and I hopped out of the car, grabbing both of our messenger bags; his was blue and white swirls, his two favorite colors. Sora wore skinny jeans; a light blue Aeropostale t-shirt, fingerless gloves, and GIANT Vans shoes that made him feet look super-big. He always jokes that the bigger the feet, the bigger the…well you know what I mean…but Riku told me otherwise.

As we walked into the school I noticed how nice the gardens and architecture were. I wanted to be an artist and everyone who saw my artwork told me that no one would be better, but I always doubt myself when it comes to what I can do with my life. Sometimes I just feel so down about myself it just doesn't feel right to believe I can do things. Whatever.

The gardens had every kind of flower you could imagine, lily of the valley, roses, daisies, and a lot more. The architecture of the school was amazing, I heard this used to be a private one but was changed when no one could afford it. The guy who built it didn't care though, he just wanted people to be able to learn. Sounds like a freakin saint. Well it was a brick building with ivy running up the walls and to the sign that said in flowing cursive: Kingdom Yamatori. I guess that was the name of the guy or something. But it was noticeable right away that some of the letters were crossed out and now it read: Kingdom Yaoi. Woah, I hope so magical sign. I wonder if there are any cute boys here I could go out with…oh stop thinking like that Roxas who would want to go out with a freak like you?

"Sooooo Roxy see any cute boys yet?" Sora said, reading my mind with a devious smile. Damn this stupid twin connection! Despite my frustration I looked around, but not seeing anyone that really caught my eye…

"OOF!" the air was knocked out my small body as I was thrown to the ground, my messenger bag flying off somewhere. My shoulder hit the ground hard and throbbed a little. I looked at the figure standing over me and my breath stopped coming and my brain stopped sending signals.

The boy standing over me had the spikiest, reddest hair I had ever seen, and towered over me, especially since I was now on the ground, but all of my pain had ben totally forgotten. He also had the greenest eyes I had ever seen...they were so beautiful. With a blush I noticed his tight shirt gripping his most-likely toned muscles underneath, and his pale, absolutely perfect skin. His face was angled and chiseled at the same time.

*drool*

Oh my god he was the hottest guy I had ever seen.

But now I noticed the way he was looking at me...in that wierd "hi now I'm going to rape you" smile...well now it was more like somewhat of a smirk.

Ew...well that's a little creepy...

"Hey Roxas, Roxas! You all right? I asked you three times already man!" Sora all but screamed into my ear.

"Huh? Oh yeah, I'm fine," I say while trying to gather my thoughts and messenger bag off the floor.

But then I noticed the hand being held out in front of me. It was the guy, still with the annoying smirk on his face.

"S-sorry about running into you like that, I wasn't paying attention, "I stuttered out. Damn! Why did I have to be so shy? I took his hand and found that it was slightly calloused but smooth none the less, and a lot bigger than mine, enveloping it completely. He pulled me up in one motion, omg sexy!

"Heh, that's all right, I'm Axel by the way. A-X-E-L, got it memorized?" He said smoothly, still holding my hand, uhm ok let me go now weird yet sexy dude!

He then used his other hand to grope my ass and pull me even more towards him.

I cursed myself as I allowed some sort of squeal out and my face turned an even deeper shade of his hair. I shook a little with surprise and a little fear that he was going to molest me.

Scratch that, he already has.

"W-wha-what the hell are you doing? Let me go!" I said with as much indignation as I could in this situation. His smirk only grew as I struggled against his obviously stronger and muscled body. Now that I was right next to him and looking up, I saw that he was more than a head taller than me, nearly two. Oh my god how old was he? Pedo!

Well maybe it as just because I was short.

"I don't really think I want to," he whispered sexily in my ear, which made me grow even more red and nervous.

I would never admit that at that point I was slightly, and ONLY slightly…aroused.

But this guy was taking it waaaay too far, he was just a creep!

All of this happened (the beginning of the grope-fest) in less than 30 seconds so Sora was just standing there shocked, but soon moved into action to help his little brother.

"LET ME GO YOU PERV!" I also snapped out of it and started yelling and struggling, god he was strong! He only seemed to like it more, which is, me with a flushed face moving against and hitting an part of him I could reach in this position I didn't really have much control in.

SUPER PERV!

_You like it! _

Damn you inner monologue! Why do you always come at the most inconvenient at times?

My inner monologue didn't have time to answer because I was shocked at what happened next.

Sora of course burst into action after realizing some random perv was molesting his "little" brother. He ran around Axel who was too busy to notice him, and delivered a super-ninja roundhouse kick to the back of his legs. Yay!

No. No yay at all.

Sora apparently was not smart enough (shocking, I know) to realize if he made the giant topple down with one of his super-roundhouse kicks to his skinny legs, he would topple down.

Right on top of me.

His legs flew out from under him and he looked rather surprised and angry for a moment for someone kicking him, but then he realized what he was going to land on.

I was more surprised than anyone, since I didn't see Sora do anything due to the muscular torso keeping me from doing anything.

So I immediately assumed the worse when Axel caught me in one of his arms and stopped both of us from falling with the other.

After he said "I like this a lot better," with that stupid smirk on his face and an implying glint in those neon-green eyes I immediately thought:

"RAPE!" I screamed with everything I had in my tiny blonde body. _Omg omg omg he's actually going to rape me!_

The smirk was quickly erased from his face when he heard me scream this, replaced with surprise, and confusion, his eyebrows creasing together. Before the understanding could even show on his face of what I thought of the whole situation I had taken action.

I kneed him in the balls. Hard.

As soon as he started to fall I rolled out from under him, grabbed my messenger bag and ran away, tears flowing out of my eyes. While he laid there in pain, probably not that much since I was extremely weak…but whatever! Ugh I still hated that I'm not very strong…if I was I could've gotten myself out of that situation sooner!

And a lot of others too…

That was the main reason I was crying…I nearly relived THAT situation all over again…

Oh god…

I stopped at a deserted hallway and slid down to the floor, my messenger bag limply hanging off my shoulder, which now I noticed still hurt by the way. That Axel guy didn't make it any better by holding me like that by force. Why did he do that? It's never gone that far with any dude who's liked me, well, any guy…my age anyway…no Roxas stop it! Stop thinking of that! When Sora and I moved here it was supposed to be better…better than there.

More important question of all of this was: why did I like it?

Hey I did struggle and feel extremely pissed off and violated about the whole situation but there was a small part of me in the back of my mind that actually liked him holding me like that…minus the groping…or maybe also the groping…oh I don't know!

I was still panting from running all that way, but then I started to become afraid…where was I? Oh god I don't even know this school how am I supposed to get back?

Oh no…SORA! I had completely forgotten about my twin! He was still back there with the pervert Axel dude! What if he was getting groped? Oh no no no! Riku please be there!

I was panicking so much that I hadn't even noticed that I had gotten up and started running, and that I had just bumped into something. Again. Damn what is with me and running into random people?

Then I noticed it was someone I knew. Xemnas!

He looked down at me in all of his douche bag glory. His yellow-orangish eyes glinted when he saw me below him, he had all black clothes on that made his hair look even whiter than usual, I saw that he had grown it out but the spikes were still present. His tan skin was covering a vast amount of muscles. Still into steroids I see.

"Why Roxas nice to see you in these hallowed halls," he said with his creepy-ass evil grin. Oh god it looked like a rapist grin! No not again damn it!

He grabbed my hand my force and pulled me up harshly.

"I miss having you in the Organization, Roxas. Why don't you come back?" he all but purred in my ear. I shivered in disgust.

"The Organization is done and over with, Xemnas! I would never some back to you! Especially since you tried to get Riku, your own brother, into steroids! No one cares how you screw up your body but don't try to get other people to do the same!" I yelled at him, feeling my temper boiling over. I never got to yell at him for what he did to Riku. He still was my friend, even if he was with Sora most of the time.

I saw Xemnas clench his jaw and the anger glinting off of those snake-like eyes. His fists clenched and I heard the leather strain. I probably should've divulged my disgusted feelings to him when there were other people around.

"Just shut up you pathetic little bitch! It's none of your concern what I do and you will be mine whether you like it or not!" Xemnas screamed, a vein popping up in his forehead as he lifted up a hand to strike me with.

I covered my face with my skinny arms, but the blow never came.

"Pft. Who do you think you're calling a bitch?"

**Who came to Roxas' rescue, Sora, Axel, Riku, or someone else? Find out in the next chappy! Cliff hanger ending! R&R and it gives me motivation to write more 4 you guys! :D Got it memorized? lol it kinda rhymes...^^**


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